“Introverted Kids Need to Learn to Speak Up at School”

Below is a short piece on teaching introverts by Jennifer Lahey, a teacher and blogger from New Hampshire.She writes for the NY Times and The Atlantic, where this article is posted.

Next week marks the beginning of parent-teacher conferences. I can count on a few issues to come up: how I calculate grades, the degree to which I am willing to chase students for late work, and individual parents’ expectations about the flow of information between school and home. But this year, I am hearing lot of questions about how to best educate introverted students and, specifically, the fairness of class participation grades. I have experimented with many different grading strategies over the years, but class participation remains a constant in my grade book. It counts for a lot because we spend a large percentage of our of class time in dialogue. How does Pip change once he receives his Great Expectations? What does Edmund mean when he says, “Thou, nature, art my goddess; to thy law / My services are bound”? When it comes time to assess my students’ engagement with these questions, I could quiz them daily and force them to write reams about the topics I want them to consider. Or I can ask them to open their mouths, turn on their brains, and share their ideas with the rest of the class. I opt for a happy medium, and require a little bit of both. This is no problem for the extroverts, who live for the opportunity to talk about their ideas. However, I also teach introverts, who live in fear of being asked these sorts of questions. There are a lot of students populating the middle ground, of course, but I don’t tend to hear from those students’ parents at conference time. The parents of introverts complain that I am not meeting their child’s unspoken educational needs, or that I am causing serious emotional trauma by requiring their child to speak up in school. I am aware that as an extrovert, I naturally teach to and understand the needs of extroverts. Consequently, I have worked very hard to research and implement teaching strategies that work for introverted students. I have a personal interest in the subject as well, as I am married to one introvert and mother to another. Thankfully, there’s more information on introverts out there than ever before. I tapped into my amazing personal learning network of educators and gathered a towering pile of books on my nightstand, topped by Susan Cain’s book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking. In her book, Cain champions the often-overlooked talents and gifts of introverts, and offers parents and educators strategies for communication and evaluation. This year, I drew on this advice and made a number of changes to my classroom in order to improve learning opportunities for my introverted students. In the end, I have decided to retain my class participation requirement. As a teacher, it is my job to teach grammar, vocabulary, and literature, but I must also teach my students how to succeed in the world we live in — a world where most people won’t stop talking. If anything, I feel even morestrongly that my introverted students must learn how to self-advocate by communicating with parents, educators, and the world at large. Dr. Kendall Hoyt — introvert, assistant professor of medicine at Dartmouth Medical School — agrees. “You don’t get a pass for your personality type. I understand that social anxiety is a real thing – I am an introvert, and my mother used to actually faint if she had to do public speaking – but part of my job as a teacher is to teach people how to articulate and be heard.” Hoyt applies this same philosophy to her own children, both introverts. She and her babysitter have constructed elaborate social scavenger hunts for the children, games that require them to approach strangers, look them in the eye, and ask for whatever the game requires – directions, information, or signatures. When I asked her why she puts so much effort into her children’s ability to communicate with strangers, she answered, “In order to be effective in this world, you must be able to communicate. If you can’t speak up for yourself, if you can’t muster the courage to tell the person you love that you love them, if you can’t advocate for your own safety, the world will be a very intimidating and frightening place. I don’t want my kids to be intimidated by the world.” When a parent tells me that his or her child is simply not capable of communicating educational and emotional needs, I see a child even more in need of mastering interpersonal communication. I’m not talking about the value of communication as it relates to grades here; I am talking about the value of communication as it relates to personal health, happiness, and safety. A student who is unwilling to stand up for herself and tell me that she does not understand the difference between an adverb and a verb is also less likely to stand up for herself if she is being harassed or pressured in other areas of her life. Thanks to my students, Hoyt, and the reams of literature and research on introverts, I have a newfound respect for the people in my life who are less apt to jump into the fray of class discussion. But I also know that sometimes it’s important – even imperative – to speak up for one’s self. Cain starts her book Quiet with the example of Rosa Parks and the historic “No” she gave the bus driver who asked her to move to the back of the bus. Cain reports that, according to her obituary, Parks was an introvert. And yet that introvert spoke up and claimed her rightful place in the world. In honor of Rosa Parks, Susan Cain, and the many introverted students under my tutelage, I will continue to encourage them to find their voices.

I agree with Leahy that it is an important for introverts to get over their shyness and anxiety and speak up for themselves and make connections with strangers. Although my family is very extroverted, it is one of the reasons I chose to raise my children overseas. I see that they feel more comfortable speaking with a variety of people and have more self-confidence because they are with adults more. I don’t like those teenagers in the US that cannot speak with adults.

The students here at ISB are mostly great self advocates. I think this comes from being from the upper socio-economic families which gives them confidence in dealing with others. There are however in every school, quiet students that naturally tend not to stand out in groups. ISB is small enough that much of this is eliminated- because of the few number of students in a classroom, everyone has to participate and it is easier to make a contribution.

Parents can help their children, introverted or extroverted, by encouraging them and giving them opportunities to speak up for themselves. For example, whether this be at a restaurant and they want another drink, or if a classmate is bothering them at school, to state their feelings or opinion.

Latest Reading: Dreamland: Adventures in the Strange Science of Sleep

I read this book with great interest due to sleep’s impact on student learning. Working with high school students, I see the struggle they have with their sleep patterns. Teenagers’s body rhythms are not the same as adults and I see the effect every morning as many of them walk into school blurry-eyed. Adolescents need nine hours of sleep to be fully restored and many of them do not get it due to busy schedules, electronics, and a biological clock that is three hours behind adults. What 10:00 PM is to an adult, 1:00 AM is to a teenager, so they tend to go to bed much later, but are forced to get up the same time as fully mature adults. Going to bed at 10:00 PM for many is a biological impossibility.  The book quotes an University of Kentucky study that showed the average high school student gets only 6 and 1/2 hours a sleep per night. I often hear from students and teachers that the “prime time” for our students to study is between 10:00 PM – 1:00 AM. It makes sense to start high schools later than elementary and middle schools, and I would not start anytime before 9:00 AM. The research shows adolescents show less depression and better moods and learning with a later start. A study in Minnesota school district showed students SAT scores jumped 300 points with a later school starting time. I also thought it would be a great idea to have “napping rooms” in high schools. The research indicates that 20 minute-naps are best, so allowing a student 30-minutes of quiet time during the day would certainly aid their learning by “helping the brain better assess and make connections between objects.”

The author David Randall did a lot of research and interviewed a lot of people to write the book. It is quite comprehensive and I also took a personal interest in sleep due to my insomnia. The author suffers from sleep walking and so like him, I also learned a lot from the book about sleep to see if it could help me. The book gives a lot of suggestions for better sleep, including devices that measure the quality of REM sleep and allow one of consciously improve the quality of sleep.

Some of the points I would like to stress are as follows:

  • In getting children to sleep, routine is paramount. Getting the kids in a relaxing set routine like turning out the lights around the house, a warm bath or book reading at a consistent time every evening, will lead to better behaved and more focused kids at school.
  •  We need sleep to organize our experiences and learning during the day. It puts new ideas and experiences into our current schema and revises the schema based on new evidence. It helps consolidate new learning.
  • Sleep is still a very strange and little understood phenomenon. I can see why the Greek god of sleep, Hypnos was the twin brother of the god of death, Thanatos, and the son of the goddess of the night, Nyx. 
  • There were some very interesting biological points brought up in the book. For example, with the advent of electric light, human’s sleep cycles were altered. Pre-artificial light, people went to sleep earlier and defined “two sleeps” one in which they wake up around midnight for an hour and then go back to bed. Randall refers to an interesting study from the National Institute of Mental Health in Bethesda, Maryland that deprived patients of artificial light.
  • For international schools, jet-lag can be a problem, especially at the start of terms or recruiting season for administrators. Stanford University researchers looked at NFL games which showed west coast teams dominated east coast teams, winning 71% of the time when playing on the west coast. “Shifting three times zones was the kiss of death” for football teams. I guess the same can be said for schools.

There is much more in the book and I highly recommend it to school administrators. It is causing me to look critically at our time table and help our adolescents feel and perform their best.